Good grief.

Listen, F, I’m really sorry you’re having such baby momma drama but do you really need it as the first few lines of your profile?

Save it for cocktails. On your 10th date. Or if you’ve been remiss in your emails, then you can tell people about your tragic mess in an EMAIL.

Since he was such a sad sack bringing some realness I didn’t need to see before my morning coffee, I gave him a Hermy feel to his hair. Now I don’t feel so blue! In my head, he’s off on a zany adventure looking for his kid with the help of Yukon Cornelius!

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